Summer
I’m trying to turn my life around a bit as of late. My main goal is trying to become more healthy. I’m not just trying to lose wait because honestly my size doesn’t bother me all that much, I’ve been big my entire life so it is just something that I deal with, but what I can’t stand is just how unhealthy I am. I’ve been walking everyday (except today because I woke up too late) and I’ve been doing about 5 miles everyday. I already feel better too, even though it hasn’t been very long, I feel good about myself in that I’m getting up everyday instead of sleeping all day, and trust me it is hard I am not a morning person. But I like the sense of accomplishment that I feel when I get done. I think I may even try to quit smoking though that is going to be extremely hard with the stress here at home, but all the same. I hate that I get winded after 2 flights of stairs. I’m 22 for goodness sake, 2 flights of stairs should not be a problem. I’m ready for a change, I don’t like being the fat friend anymore. I also think I’m done with dating for a while, I had an Ex trying to get back with me already and I’m not playing that game anymore. After 4 years I think it’s going to be nice to be single again. I don’t need someone in my life right now. I need to work on me and my flaws for a while. I only have one more year before grad school (hopefully!) and I’m running out of time to work on myself.
Wow that was longer than I thought it was going to be… Oh well.
Reblog if you want “have you evers” in your ask box.
So
Being home so far is not going well. It is a war zone here and I’m just trying to keep everything together. But I don’t kno how long that is going to last. I don’t kno how much longer my family is going to stay a family, and I want to stress that I’m not over exaggerating. Both sides are talking about it, but as of this moment no one is going to pull to plug. I’m worried, I’ve already gone through one divorce, I’m not looking forward to another, and then there are my sisters. I’m trying to keep them out of this as much as possible, but after the mother’s day blowout even they are aware of how bad it is getting.
I don’t kno where I will go if they split. I don’t think I could pick a side in the whole thing, I’m just hoping we can hold it together for a bit longer. (If my parent ever find my tumblr I’m going to be screwed because they don’t want anyone talking about their problems, but I don’t have anyone to talk about it with. Joe was the only one who understood the situation and well don’t have him anymore.) But anyways right now they are content to continue ignoring each other and then bitching to me about how awful the other one is (“But we swear we aren’t going to drag you into this” My ass) I just have to make it through the summer and then I’m home free. Maybe I’ll move in with my gram when all is said and done, she likes me.
But for now we will continue as we are, and I’ll try not to turn into an alcoholic. Cheers.
I’m having a fat weekend. I have, and plan on continuing to eat everything that I love, that I wasn’t able to eat over the last several months. I am very happy about this.
Monday starts the campaign to begin to eat better and actually get off the couch.
it feels so great to be home, but now I have to deal everything that I left unresolved when I come home for Easter.
I’d rather take a million more German finals.
